breath.

tonight i took to the bike again.

(it's a stationary bike so i can focus on my breath rather than traffic, road conditions, weather, etc..)

and so, tonight, i remembered my breathing. i felt the air rushing down my throat. it was shocking at first. like leaping into lake water. ragged even. and then the rhythm came again. and the breath started to seep down into my belly, and leak into my arms, and drip into my legs. until, finally, i could feel my breath bathing each organ as it should. and in that moment, there wasn't the labor of 'exercise', only awareness of breath.

tonight i cried a bit.

(i don't do it often enough, i suppose: focus on tears, rather than ever the positive, the silver lining, the upside, etc..)

and so tonight, i remembered my emotions. at first, trying to manage them, like swimming upstream. it was searing, the feelings rushing into my chest, the ache of missing someone. and then the tears came, and bathed my aching spirit. as they fell, a surge of love rose. as they rested in crevices (face, neck, fingertips) i remembered my breath.

i let the two work together. cleansing and nourishing. breath and emotion. balancing the two is tricky. finding a place where they can exist together without one drowning the other. letting them live together inside my chest.

i'm finding in love, and in emotion, and in breathing, that my capacity is great.

tonight, i took to the bike, i cried....
and tonight.... balance remains.

so it is.