are you afraid of this happiness?

so... are you?

my first reaction is, NO! i embrace this happiness. not only do i believe in this happiness, i am this happiness. i even know that i deserve this happiness. but that doesn't set me apart from anyone else. we all deserve it.

you deserve it.

to be afraid of happiness.... and yet, i know people are. i know there are moments (yes, moments) when my ego flares and says, "well, enjoy it for now, 'cause it don't last!" but that doesn't last either. i watch people moving through life in fear. i remember what it felt like when fear owned me. it was awful. nothing was as bright (or as sad) nothing was full (or empty). it was as if the pendulum stood still.

i've often heard the idea that the opposite of love is not hate, but fear.

when the pendulum stands still, then life and growth and balance halt. and you're at the tipping point between living and 'trying not to die'. and believe me, it's up to you. you decide, just as you deserve.

happiness, to me, isn't all about comedies, and raucous laughter, and having what you want or need. i suppose happiness to me is awareness, consciousness, ability to be quiet and to be satisfied, and to be hungry and to be alive.

is it possible to be sad within happiness? i say yes. to be angry inside happiness? yes.

what are you afraid of? fear not, this happiness. for i say this happiness is life, and love, and waking up, and falling asleep in peace, with the weight of the beloved's hand on your belly.

this happiness is yours.
and mine.

so it is.